The Accusation...

I was accused of over sharing. Well, not really accused, but I was told that I share a lot and it wasn’t exactly presented to me as a compliment. The funny thing is, I don’t even talk about half of what is going on in my head and if need be, am a Fort Knox of secrets, even from family. I can provide character references to attest to that.

But yes, I took the statement as an accusation, although I do not believe that was the intent, and needed some time to reflect on exactly why. The person would felt that I share too much is probably reading this and I consider him/her to be a smart, funny individual. An individual who also shares a lot via social networking, but his/her sharing is more about music or seeing humor in the insanity of this world. So I guess s/he is a sharer in a different way.

There are parts of me that are private. There are parts of me that I only share with the bitches and my closest humans like Man Friend. But there are also parts of me, like my struggles with drinking or men that I am totally open about, whether it’s in this forum or a more personal setting. Maybe you have to get to a place where you have been stripped of everything but your stories to realize just how much power your words have.

I remember walking down the street one day with Alli in the pre-Joey days. We were strolling along 15th and I came to the conclusion that I own nothing. Part of it was being fairly fresh off of a break up in which many material possessions and one canine were taken from me. But it took losing those things to make me really understand what I valued. It didn’t matter what titles or legalities might apply, the only thing I really possessed was my sense of spirituality and self. I didn’t even own that beautiful bitch next to me, she was her own little spirit and I was somehow lucky enough to have had her dance into my life.

So “stuff” took on a new meaning and I learned that the real power in ownership is in owning your own shit. That sentence will make perfect sense to you or no sense at all. And that’s okay. Part of my owning my shit is acknowledging the validity or ridiculousness of my thoughts and feelings. Sharing them might help somebody else. I know it helps me.