Because there are better things to do while sitting on the toilet...

It's been a long time. Too damned long, really. I was letting life get me all out of whack and not really sure which way was up. I know you've felt that way yourself. And since I've been all about trying to be a better, more-centered person and not letting my ego run the show anymore, I made a fateful decision.



Last Thursday, I gave up Facebook for 30 days.



Since it was my primary form of contact with a lot of people, it was a little scary to me. I mean, how would I know who was blaming who for what, or who was knocked up, or who hates his/her ________ (insert job/boss/significant other/best friend/parent)? How would I be able to see what all the anti-choice crazies are up to this week without those status updates that alternately sent chills down my spine or made my blood boil?



It started as an innocent little wager with Man Friend. He was always giving me shit for being on my phone all the time. "You Facebooking?" or "You on the Book?" seemed to be the most popular question at my house. And, although I must admit that the amount of asking, while annoying, really made me think about how I was spending my time.



I would check it first thing in the morning. Like while I was peeing and before I made coffee. I would check it at stoplights. I would check it when I was bored at work. I would check it on my break from work. I would check it on commercial breaks while I was watching TV. I would take reading breaks to check it. I would bring my phone everywhere just so I could check the damned Book. And it certainly was the last thing I would check before I went to sleep at night, the bright little screen jacking with my brain just before my head hit the pillow.



A little obsessive, definitely. And a little crazy for a woman who has no trouble admitting that she's an alcoholic and really shouldn't have a drink for the rest of her days on this earth.



There have been many moments in which I had to tell myself to put down the phone and take a couple of breaths. Then I remind myself that ultimately, the universe will tell me the things that I need to hear. The rest is just noise...