SEE RED

So my Bulls lost. Sigh… such a fun season to watch it was. I write like Yoda when I am reflecting whimsically. I became a Bulls fan back in the 90s. Six championships in eight years. Da Bulls. Between the SNL skits, Wheaties boxes, and Starter jacket I was legit.

I’ll admit that I fell off the face of NBA watching for a bit. I always liked KG, so I followed the Wolves and then became a bandwagon Boston fan. For the record, Rondo is the only good thing that ever came out of Kentucky. Beast.

Then this year, the Bulls caught my eye again. Maybe it’s WGN televising the games or some sort of reminiscing for my youth, but I started Seeing Red again and a big part of that was the play of Derrick Rose.

Rose deserved the MVP, whatever any of you may think. Of course, I cannot be impartial when it comes to my boy, but he is exactly what basketball needed. He is a hometown boy, a smart player, a team leader, and a good shooter who also knows when to pass and make electrifying plays. With all the Big Three nonsense, yes I said nonsense ‘cuz to hell with ‘em, and too many years of Kobesque bullshit, we basketball fans longed for a hero. I know there was an academic issue at Memphis, so we don’t need to fight that out. I never said he was completely without fault. I’m only looking for Rose to be a basketball messiah.

And what a great band of disciples he has, I mean, Jesus named brothers James and John “bo-aner’ges,” which means “sons of thunder.” Sons of thunder? Hello? Noah and Boozer. I think so. Deng’s gotta be right up there as Peter and let’s call Korver Matthew since he looks the most like an accountant. A dumb accountant, but an accountant none the less. However, there is no Judas here. These guys play so well together and are young. I know they’ll be back to get theirs.

But now I guess I have to be some sort of bandwagon fan. I’ve already told Miami to suck it. It’s like watching the Yankees play anyone or seeing results from Republican primaries. I’m cheering against someone, not for anyone…

However, the bitches are always up for supporting a fellow Kraut, so Go Dirk. It’s like some sort of Nazi dream, pinning my hopes on the white German basketball player… I should quit now before I offend anyone else…